Episode #17: The Weekly Mercies of Pam Ellis

Christ the Lord is risen today, Alleluia!
Earth and heaven in chorus say, Alleluia!
Raise your joys and triumphs high, Alleluia!
Sing, ye heavens, and earth reply, Alleluia!

I stood looking at the stage of our church, decked out for Easter and gave a happy sigh. My family sat around me, I looked pretty good in my new easter outfit, and hope just exuded from the day. After all, it was hard not to be hopeful on the day Jesus conquered sin and death. I sang with my heart.

Love's redeeming work is done, Alleluia!

Fought the fight, the battle won, Alleluia!

Death in vain forbids him rise, Alleluia!

Christ has opened paradise, Alleluia!

I wanted to shout for joy, real joy.  Easter had always been a favorite of mine, but the true hope Jesus offered by His work was so amazing and I could feel that hope flowing through me.

Lives again our glorious King, Alleluia!
Where, O death, is now thy sting? Alleluia!
Once he died our souls to save, Alleluia!
Where's thy victory, boasting grave? Alleluia

There was the normal shuffle as someone prayed. I confess I have a hard time closing my eyes during the prayer. I find it very interesting to watch as the worship team steps off, the sound team scurrie to make adjustments and the pastor gets into place.

Pastor Dave smiled at us. “He is Risen.”

“He is Risen indeed!” I said, along with so many others.

“Easter is always such a special day. But often we celebrate the wrong thing.”

Inwardly, I cringed and was ready to tune out. We weren’t exactly an Easter Bunny church. My family had gone to maybe three Easter Egg hunts in my childhood. I felt my excitement for the sermon slipping.

“We often celebrate Jesus coming to make bad people good,” Pastor Dave said. “But that isn’t what He came to do. He came to make dead people live again.”

I let out a long breath. Now, there was a message I could get behind and needed.

And as the pastor continued. I realized I needed it more than I thought. In my quest to restore hope and joy, I had lost sight of the fact that I needed new life and only Jesus could give that.

I grabbed a cup of lavender vanilla tea at work and started to take down the Easter decorations in the store. In an hour, when the store opened. I wanted to be well on my way to having our new seasonal display up. I loved all the books and items Lacie had picked out for our spring display. I removed all the Easter books and put them on the cart to be returned to the back room. I wove the beautiful spring garlands around the shelves and moved the books that were staying into the correct places.

Jesus didn’t come to make bad people good, but to bring dead people to life.

The sermon would be with me for a while. It made me think of Carol. I wondered how she was doing. I should message her and tell her how her new year’s post had impacted me. Oh! I needed to decide what I would do this week from my list.

I stepped back from the display and smiled at how cheerful the flowers looked on the display case. That was what I would do! I would get flowers and arrange them.

I watched a couple of videos and decided I just wanted to have fun arranging the flowers I bought. I like the idea of looking professional, but it was more effort than I wanted to go into. I arranged the greenery, baby’s breath, and pink carnations out in front of me and put my earbuds in. I was listening through an old favorite. Pollyanna. I adored the book. I didn’t understand how Pollyanna had ever become a cultural way of saying shallow optimism because that wasn’t what the book offered.

It had been far too long since I had read this story. I smiled as I remembered my mother reading this book aloud to us one summer. I missed our homeschooling days. Actually, I just missed our family being happy together. What had happened to change things?

Jesus came to make dead people live again.

I brushed a tear from my nose and then another. If that is what Jesus had come to do, why wasn’t he doing it for my parents’ marriage? Why did my parents still barely talk to each other after the months of counseling? Why did I still feel like there was a part of my heart that was dead because of all that had happened with Jessie?

“Why aren’t You bringing life?” I asked, pushing a stem of greenery into the vase.

I retrieved my Bible and went over some of the sections I had read recently. How many times had God been working and people not recognized it at the time? Abraham waiting for Isaac. Joseph spent years in prison. God took the people on a long route to the promised land. God had a plan, but it wasn’t easy to understand. Many people never did.

I took a deep breath and felt myself choking on my tears. Knowing God had a plan and living it out were two different things.

“Please help me to trust Your plan.” I prayed. I returned to arranging my flowers and listening as Pollyanna pulled a whole town into playing the glad game. As soon as all four vases were filled, I pulled out my mercies notebook.

The knowledge that Jesus can bring life out of dead things

Knowing that God has a plan

God’s mercy in knowing that my heart and brain may falter and sometimes doubt, but He is faithful

For spring flowers