The Destiny of One

We Need You: A Very Bookish 4th of July Launch Team

10:05 PM

The Faithfulness of God: Our Story

9:03 PM

When I told my community group about Scott and me, I started with the words: This is a story of God's faithfulness. Because, as with the best kind of love stories, this isn't just our story. This is a story of God's faithfulness in both our lives and the lives of those around us.

In 2014 my Mom and I prayed almost daily for a family we could be friends with and do life together. We were feeling isolated and in need of deep Christian fellowship. At the end of that year, my sister Rose made friends with a couple of brothers through filmmaking. I met them when they came to film a live nativity that we were a part of.

I didn't spend much time talking with any of them until January of 2015 when I also met one of their other brothers, Scott. I was not feeling well that day, but I was impressed with the godly and humble way they talked to and about each other. Scott also saw that my youngest sister was bored and made her smile, which made me like him. I didn't talk much, but I did share a little about what God was teaching me through our family's work at the food pantry. Scott told me recently that after I spoke, he thought I would make a good friend.

Our family's started spending a lot of time together. As 2015 progressed, Saturdays would find some or all four Larkin brothers at our house. God was molding me a lot that year, teaching me some very important lessons. Scott always seemed to be at our house on the tough days.

As the months continued to roll by, we found we understood each other well and could talk for long periods of time about anything and everything. By the end of the year, we were best friends. And I also realized that I had started having feelings for Scott. I don't know really when I started caring more, because it came on slowly. There really wasn't a moment I started loving him, it was a lot of moments.

I had seen a couple of friends ruin good friendships with guys because they wanted a romantic relationship instead. I didn't want that to happen to Scott and me. I figured my feelings would fade and our friendship would be worth any squashed feelings. Scott trusted me with his friendship. I didn't want to betray that trust.

I had ups and downs with my feelings in 2016. I would be content most of the time, and there were a few times that it was hard. I did a lot of praying. What I didn't know was that Scott has started caring for me that year. He had his own challenges to work through. He also needed time to consider what to do, not the least of which is the friendship we had was special to him as well.

God was faithful. He knew that we both had some learning to do and some trials ahead. He upheld both of us.

2017 remains the hardest, most emotionally draining year of my life. I was hard-pressed on every side. There were days I curled up and cried, telling God I couldn't take any more emotional pain. On those days, I would often get a text from Scott. On the really bad days, God often arranged for Scott to be over at our house. Our friendship was deepened and so was our love for each other. It was a tough year, but one that God used in my life to build my character and our friendship.

God's faithfulness continued because while Scott and I cared more than ever for each other, He had a few things to teach me. 2018 was a time of healing for me as God put the pieces of my life back together.

One of the ways I maintained a healthy relationship with Scott is being open with my Mom and a couple of friends about my struggle. At the beginning of the year, since my feelings are grown, I set up more boundaries in my relationship with Scott. I didn't initiate conversations often and I also moved to sharing deeper stuff with my female friends. One of my friends, Jessica challenged me toward the end of 2018 that I needed to take a day and pray about my relationship with Scott. I think she sensed my heart was not in the right place.

God was faithful, I got home from work and walked down our country road. It was cold and windy and I was praying for what God wanted me to do. God showed me the state of my heart. I was clinging so tightly to the friendship. In my heart, I was demanding God not touch it, not change it, not take it. I cried out to God, telling Him I wanted to surrender the friendship to Him, but I was afraid. It was a long walk but in the end, I stood with open hands and told God that He had given the friendship in the first place. It was His to do with as he pleased.

While Scott and I were still good friends, 2019 brought new challenges. We had things that seemed to interfere some with our friendship. I thought God was using them to slowly pull us apart. There were days I was grateful, and there were days I wanted to grab the friendship back from God's hands. I sang I Surrender All a lot that year.

While 2020 was a crazy year for just about everyone, I found a lot of hope in that year. I had struggled with pain in my right arm for months that God provided help for in the form of a talented physical therapist. I missed the Larkins visits as the lockdown progressed in Texas. Scott and I communicated some, but not as much as in the past. I continued to pray for open hands.

A 2021 New Years' conversation with Scott made me feel hopeful about our friendship, but that quickly turned into the most silence between us, both in-person and text, in the history of our friendship. I knew our friendship was about to change. I thought he was getting ready to tell me we needed to take a step back. The silence was really because he was preparing to ask if we could take a step forward. I however became stressed to the point I was struggling to focus. I wanted to live with open hands, but I knew the pain of losing a friendship I valued. I was not looking forward to that conversation.

God's faithfulness continued. On a usual Saturday visit, on February 6th, the Larkins arrived to find me painting the playscape, one of the projects I had taken on to deal with the stress I was feeling. Scott and I interacted a bit, but the tension was pretty obvious. At the end of the day, I went outside to escape that tension. When he asked to come with me, I said yes more because it was the right thing to do than I felt like having him.

We sat on the porch. I knew this was the moment I had been dreading...or so I thought. My world shifted and the beauty of the moment of hearing that he loved me and then being able to say it back was pretty amazing.

The following Monday, Scott and I took a walk in the evening down that same country lane where I had prayed, wrestled, and finally handed the relationship to Jesus. I told him that story, and he shared some of his story. We also spent time talking about guardrails, our word choice for the boundaries in our relationship.

My dear readers, this is a story of God's faithfulness. The joy I feel right now is so deep because it's founded on years of living with open hands before God. It wasn't always easy. In fact, there were some really hard days. Yet, God's faithfulness through all of it is why I'm here, with Scott today.

Adventure Between the Pages

The Shadowfields by Mary Ruth Pursselley

1:00 AM

Find it on: Goodreads | Kindle | Paperback

Age Appropriate For: 13 and up mild peril and very mild romance

Best for Ages: 13 to 30

Description: For uprooted orphan Elizabeth Corrington, nothing in life stays the same for long—not even the place she calls home or the people who look after her. But when a heart-breaking rejection brings her to live with her eccentric grandfather on the magnificent Shadowfield Estate, Elizabeth discovers not only the stability she has longed for, but a world of freedom, adventure, imagination, and unexpected friendships, too.)

But rejection has left her insecure and vulnerable; change threatens her world again, a manipulative uncle has plans for her home and future…and she may not have the strength or ability to resist.

Mary Ruth Pursselley (AKA Mary Schlegel) is a talented writer who I’ve enjoyed. This novella was one of those rare ones that has the depth of a novel, vibrant characters, lots of emotion. This author seems to do an excellent job with shorter works. Though, I really enjoyed her fantasy novel I read as well.

One of the things that I love about reading indie authors is you can find sweet stories. You know, the old-fashioned kind where no one has weird problems and traumatic pasts do not always include things I would rather not read about. This story was a feel-good read, but not without it’s moments of sadness, and not without the main character going through some pain.

Elizabeth was a sweet girl, but goes through some tough stuff. Also, she is willing to stand up to people when the situation calls for it. Sweet and strong. I love those kind of girls. The secondary characters were great! I loved all of them.

The setting in England was beautiful and vivid. This author is great at painting word pictures without even using a lot of words. That’s probably why her novellas are so good.

I highly recommend this to those who like novellas, sweet historical fiction, and light reads that still have depth to them.

Where Destiny Takes You

Destiny and the Master's hand

11:00 AM

I've heard many sermons that compare God to a master painter. Each moment of our lives is a stroke of His brush. Sometimes, He paints with dark colors and we wonder if we will ever see the light again. Sometimes the colors are mixed, dizzying in their many shades and the quick changes. And then there are times when God starts painting with bright colors, colors that are beautiful and rich, and suddenly so many of the dark strokes, the dizzying twists, all come into focus and you can see part of the picture God is painting.

Recently, I have had one of those moments. You see, six years ago, God began a part of my painting. It started with my sister and her new friends. When I met this family, I was impressed with the godly way they spoke to and about each other. Our families became friends. We shared good times and bad. And among this family, I found a best friend.

Finding a best friend like I did, someone who understood me so easily was painted in bright colors. There was one complication. My best friend was a guy and after a while, I started having feelings for him. By the time I realized I had started to like him, we were already best friends. I prayed and decided that the friendship was worth protecting, even if it meant my feelings had to be laid on the altar.

The friendship was worth every sacrifice I made, every boundary I had to put up. God used it to paint light strokes into otherwise dark places. More than that, God used it to build character within me. Patience, selfless love, and courage were just a few of the lessons God taught me. Perhaps the greatest lesson was the one in surrender. I cannot tell you how many times I would come before God and say: "I'm here again with these feelings and hopes and I'm handing them back to you."

I by no means did this perfectly. In fact, there were so many days I wanted to share about some of the struggles I was having with my readers, but my best friend read my blog. I couldn't very well share what was going on inside my heart and protect the friendship while he was reading.

2020 was not an easy year for our friendship and it had little to do with the pandemic. A distance grew between us, one that I didn’t understand or have a bridge for. God's painting continued, but I had no understanding of what was going on. I became convinced that God was preparing to take away this friendship. I cried tears, but I again came before God and asked Him to help me be willing to give it back to him.

February 6th, my best friend came over but things were tough between us. When he asked to help me with a chore, I almost said no. After all, I had wanted to go outside to check the greenhouse because I wanted some space to think. As he started talking with the tone I knew was serious, I promised myself that I would not cry. I knew the moment had come when our friendship would change forever.

Dear reader, with three words God painted a new stroke across my life and changed my destiny. My best friend spoke three words that changed everything.

"I love you."

Yes, you read that right. Scott, the friend who I've cared about for so long, told me he loved me. We both have cared for each other for a while, but our friendship was more important to both of us than anything. There is a lot more to the story, much of which we are still exploring, but for now, I feel like this part of the painting is filled with every kind of bright and beautiful color. One of the most beautiful parts? The golden color of God's timing, which was perfect.

In one moment, I saw God's unfolding destiny and stood in awe. This is a gift from God I don't deserve, but one I have thanked Him for every day. I'm grateful that I'm starting this new part of my destiny with someone who has been a friend for so long.

In the days ahead, I plan to share more of our story and share more about Scott. He has been a big part of my life, but a silent part as far as this blog was concerned. I can't wait to share with you so many stories of how God has used him in my life. With that said, this will be changing a few things for me. In taking the time to build in this new relationship, my writing will be taking a back seat. As Scott is supportive of my writing, you can be sure that the writing won't stop forever, it will just take a pause.

Dear reader, I cannot tell you how happy I am. I know that this is only the beginning of my God's continuing destiny for my life.

Adventure Between the Pages

The Retrievers by Nicole Sager: A Book Review

1:00 AM

Find it on: Goodreads | Kindle | Paperback

Age Appropriate For: 14 and up for mild violence and mild scary scenes

Best for Ages: 14 – 25

Description: A race of miniature humans called to a faith of tremendous size. When the royal family of the Roden tribe of Minatchi vanishes without a trace, only Delia is left to wear the crown. Deaf since the age of three the princess prepares for a difficult reign, only to watch as her coronation day is turned into one of catastrophe. When the tribe of Minatchi disappears like their royals before, Fetch - a Bengal Retriever - faces a choice that will confront everything he knows and force him to evaluate a faith he never truly embraced. When matters quickly escalate beyond their control, the joined forces of a few will be stretched beyond their limitations, tribal loyalties, and even the border of the valley they call home. What lies beyond is more than a land of giants and untested danger...Destiny awaits the called.

When I saw one of my favorite authors had realized a new book, just before my birthday, I was so excited. I went and bought it right away. I’m so glad I did. It was worth every penny.

While almost of Sagar’s other books are in the same fictional world (she writes non-magical fantasy). This is a new world with a new race of people – people who only stand on average eight to nine inches tall.

As someone who was fascinated by the idea of tiny people when I was a kid, I ate this story up. Unlike the few books and movies I had seen/read on the subject that were a little creepy, this story was full of fun, adventure, and great morals. Sager took this very fun idea and used it not only to tell a great story but also to teach some great lessons.

The story itself had so many twists and turns that kept me on the edge of my seat. I wanted to not only know what was going to happen next but also to see if the various characters would realize their God-given potential.

As with Sager’s other books, the gospel and faith were not changed, even though it is a fantasy world. It’s one of the things that keeps me coming back.

I loved both the main characters. Fetch is a likable roughish character who I cheered for and hoped he would learn a lesson. Delia was just the best. She is deaf and goes through a lot of hard stuff and grand adventures. Her faith was the best and I loved seeing her grow into maturity.

I could go on and on about this story. I love it so much! But I’ll just end this review by saying you need to read it!

I highly recommend this book for those who love kingdom (non-magical) fantasy, adventure stories, and books that have a solid spiritual foundation.

Adventure Between the Pages

When God Walked in Galilee by Rachel Starr Thomson: A Book Review

1:00 AM

Find it on: Goodreads | Kindle | Paperback

Age Appropriate For: All Ages

Best for Ages: 15 and up

Description: Do we know who our King is?

At thirty years of age, Jesus launched his ministry with the words “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.”

Yet even before then, his life pulsated with the mystery and revelation of the kingdom of God—still the most critical and yet misunderstood component of the Christian faith and the life of anyone who desires to follow Jesus.

In this electrifying little book, author and speaker Rachel Starr Thomson argues that King and kingdom are inextricably interlinked: to see one is to see the other. In her lyrical, accessible style, she guides readers through Jesus’s early life as chronicled in the gospel of Matthew—an ancient book that bridges Old and New Testaments and reveals king, and kingdom, within their prophetic and historical context.

Every day, millions of Christians pray “Your kingdom come.” Let this journey with Jesus deepen your understanding and practice of those words as you see Jesus in a whole new light, and with him, discover the astonishing reality of the kingdom of heaven on earth.

Thomson is one of my all-time favorite authors. I've been impressed with her writing since reading her Seventh World Trilogy. While her fiction is masterful and some of my favorites, her non-fiction is quickly becoming an auto-buy for me. I was offered a chance to be part of the advanced readers for this book and I jumped at the chance.

Thomson has, for a while, shared her thoughts on Matthew in the form of blog posts. For those who have followed that series, this won't be new material. However, I haven't followed it as faithfully as I would like and it's been a long time since I read the beginning. So reading this was a delightful journey.

There were a lot of wonderful insights in this book, but I wanted to pretty much highlight all of Chapter 14. It was a powerful chapter on a passage of scripture that I too struggled to understand. Perhaps you might have already realized some of the things that Thomson points out about the temptation of Jesus. However, I'm sure that there are many things in this gem of a book that will touch your heart.

Here are a couple of my favorite quotes:

"Salvation is not simply a matter of escaping the world after death. It is holistic, and it is now (and also later)."

"Jesus is Son of God become Son of Man, eternally blurring the lines of separation between God and humanity."

"If Jesus had hinged his identity, his belief that he was who God said he was, on an outcome in his circumstances, then not getting that outcome would have had the potential to destroy his identity."

I was given a copy of this book for review purposes. I was not required to write a positive review. All thoughts in this review are my own.

Fanny's Hope Chest

Scavenger hunt Winners

8:49 AM

Adventure Between the Pages

Love, Amy: An Accidental Memoir Told in Newsletters from China by Amy Young: A Book Review

1:00 AM

Find it on: Goodreads | Kindle | Paperback | Audiobook

Age Appropriate For: 13 and up for some medical and social situations

Best for Ages: 15 and up

Description: Too often we believe that our stories don’t matter. They do. This the power of a life story unfolding over time. Amy Young quit her job, packed up her belongings, and moved to China to teach English, initially for two years. She anticipated making cultural faux pas, trying new food, seeing God at work, and growing in her knowledge of language and culture. What she could not foresee, though, was nearly dying, experiencing political unrest, taking a job that involved traveling around China, training hundreds to live and minister in China, witnessing the craziness of SARS, or experiencing multiple medical situations. Join Amy, a natural storyteller, as she shares her life in China letter by letter.

I love reading personal memoirs but I haven’t really searched out a lot of them. I stumbled across this book while searching Amazon for books about writing Christian Newsletters. I enjoyed her book Enjoying Newsletters as an author that sends out newsletters. When I finished that book, I was excited to learn more about Amy.

This book chronicles Amy’s life in China from the late ’90s to the 2000s as an English teacher. She went to China to teach English, but also to share her faith. Using the newsletters she sent her supporters, we get a glimpse of life as an English teacher as well as the changing face of China.

Many events like 9/11 and SARS are events that I remember watching unfold. It was interesting to get a look at what it was like in China at the time, not just what the news was reporting. Also, Amy did a wonderful job of showing the good and the heartbreaking parts of the culture. Her love and compassion for the people and her fellow workers was evident in how she writes.

I also apricated reading about a woman who was passionately living her life for God as a single woman. It’s obvious she also loves her family and her family seems to support her. It’s nice to see that too.

I highly recommend this to those who want to learn more about China, those who enjoy memoirs, and anyone who likes to read about real people serving God.