Speaking Honestly

1:00 AM


The past couple of years, my writing on this blog has been sporadic at best. Some of it was due to the fact I was busy, sometimes I wasn’t sure what to say, most of the time it was because I have been dealing with things that no Christian wants to admit struggling with, and I was afraid to talk about it on the blog. I knew that if I wrote a lot, it would come spilling out. Seriously, who wants to admit that you are struggling with depression and anxiety when your life is amazing? I am afraid that I have a good deal of pride, and I wasn’t able to overcome it to share what was going on until I had dealt with it.

So, now I have admitted to you two of my biggest failures: pride, and not trusting God. It was not easy for me to admit either, but I felt it was time. Too many people think they have to keep it all together on the surface. We feel we have to present a mask of the perfect Christian, and we end up feeling hollow. Why? Because only the mask gets loved (1).

I am grateful that God has brought me through my battle with depression and that I do not have to daily live under that cloud (some people, for physical, and emotional reasons cannot). God used my family, some wonderful books (2), and new friends to help me overcome the anxiety and depression that I struggled with. He also reminded me, in countless ways, that no matter what I was feeling, he was right beside me and would never leave me.

There are still days I battle with worry, but I remind myself that I am commanded not to. I am learning to leave my cares and worries in the hands of my Heavenly Father, as well as learning to be honest and humble with those around me.

It might take me a while and many trials and errors before I become good at opening up, and lose my pride, but I am striving toward that goal.



1.  Thanks to John Lynch for this amazing image

2. Loving God with All Your Mind by Elizabeth George, The Shadow Things by Jennifer Freitag, What are you Afraid of? by Dr. David Jeremiah 

You Might Also Like

8 comments

  1. That was great! I know, sometimes it's hard, sometimes I feel that way as well. That was a wonderful post!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sarah,
      I am so glad you found it encouraging.

      Delete
  2. I have never read any other post on this blog, but I just want to tell you that this post is insanely encouraging! I often struggle with anxiety, and have found that it drags me down and makes me an irritable person. This post is so encouraging. Thank You

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Claire,
      I am so glad you found it encouraging. I will be praying for you.

      Delete
  3. You're such an encouragement! I can imagine that this post was hard to write. *Hug!* God bless.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Elisabeth,
      It was hard, mainly for my pride. However, the encouraging feedback I am getting is helping me to see that God has a purpose behind everything he asks of me.

      Delete
  4. Sarah Friend,
    Know that I love and am praying for you. I've struggled with the same thing. Depression, discouragement, and anxiety are hard to beat. Some days you win and some days you don't have the energy to keep fighting and just need a break (and that's okay). I love you when you are in the valley and struggling as much as I love you when you are on the mountaintop and succeeding. Keep being brave and sharing what God is doing in your life because no matter how hard it might feel to share it with others, it is all the more encouraging for me and so many other girls to read such God inspired posts like this one and to have evidence that we aren't alone; we aren't the only ones struggling and hurting and feeling lost. Us Christian girls don't have to be perfect. You are perfectly imperfect and smothered with God's grace. that's what really counts. So thanks, sar, for being so transparent and for loving me unconditionally too. It means a lot. Love you adopted sis! <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jessica,
      Thank you for always being there for me, no matter where I am at. *Hugs*

      Delete